Empath: Setting Boundaries and Following Your Heart

I see you have stumbled across this post in search of answers, fellow empath! If like me, you have recently realized that your ability to feel deeply and understand others' emotions is both a curse and a superpower, your search is not in vain.

I will share with you how I quit the toxic addiction that is called 'people pleasing', and managed to build up my relationship with myself, and in turn, healthy relationships with others.

I will tell you a secret: the key ingredient to this is self-love.

When you love yourself, you do things from love, not for it. Upon learning to love yourself and figuring out who you are, you will find your core. At your core is what makes you happy, and your discernment about what feels right to you, and what does not. Once you are in touch with and are self-aware in the rhythm of your emotions across a vast array of situations and encounters with others, you will be able to practice managing yourself and understanding your needs at any given moment. As empaths, we always wish to help others, understand, and make others feel seen and important. This can, however, dangerously cross over into codependency - a term used when you become dangerously reliant on another person for your happiness.

This is where setting healthy boundaries comes in. You will need to realize that you must come first, no exceptions. Have you ever heard the phrase, ' One cannot pour from an empty cup?' As empaths, we tend to absorb the energies and emotions of others, as we are so in tune with everything around us, and it can be easy to lose ourselves in the moment and hard to tell if we are feeling what WE are feeling, or if we have absorbed the feelings of those around us. This is why it is important to be able to step back, take time out, and return to our own energy. This includes saying the word 'no' to others, even at the expense of their understanding. When you need rest or simply alone time, take it and respectfully stand your ground.

Once you learn to manage your superpower (or curse depending on how you choose to perceive it), things will smooth out. You will be able to stay in your 'energy' more frequently regardless of the moods and energies of those around you, all whilst still being in tune with them. There, you will find a healthy balance between empathy for others, and staying in your healthy bubble of self-love. From here on out, you will see it is possible to follow your heart, while actually having one.